By Kathy | November 28, 2009
Integrity is not a gift.
It is a reward of discipline, honesty, consistency
and doing what is right no matter the cost.
~Unknown
How true this is!!!
Integrity doesn’t just happen.
Integrity only happens as we make choices each day, choices to be:
honest kind to everyone - even to those who do not deserve it or who cannot return the kindness
alert to what is true and good - and then standing on that truth, no matter what
Choices to:
do the things we ought to - especially when we don’t want to
work hard - even if no one notices and there is no pay
use our time and talents wisely
When we chose to live this way each day- building our self-discipline, THEN integrity will be our reward. It is something that is built over a time of consistent behavior.
Topics: Teaching Good Things | Comments Off
By Kathy | August 19, 2009
How to demonstrate Resourcefulness in the Home:
*Control the clutter by being content!
Clutter in the home, even if it is good stuff, can quickly overcome your home and overwhelm all those that live there. The older I get the more I realize how little I really need or want.
How many of us have closets that are packed full, yet still claim we don’t have anything to wear and still shop for more? When I say "shop", this includes thrift stores and yard sales. How often have we bought it just because it was a "GREAT DEAL"? Then within a year the item is in a bag to go to the thrift store again?
Most Americans are so materialistic and wasteful. Sometimes I wish we were back in the day where you had 1-2 outfits for the week and then your Sunday dress. WOW! Wouldn’t that cut back on our expenses and TIME? Think of the time that is spent shopping for just the right outfit and then the time washing and drying all those outfits? And yes, I do have a closet full of nothing to wear too!
Oh, and what about nick knacks? A few pretty things that draw attention are so much better than a home full of distractions.
Our missionary friends to China once told us that giving up those "pretties" (nick knacks) was the first thing God had to deliver her from. It would be too much work to keep them dusted where they would be living and that her time would need to be spent in other ways. Oh, how wise!
Have you ever walked into a home that was fairly clutter free? Wasn’t it refreshing and inviting?
How many pairs of shoes do you or your children have? Could life be simpler with less?
Would you be less focused on self if you could be content with less? Could you use that time, energy and money in more productive ways?
When you buy something new does it replace an item you already have or is it just added to the closet?
Do you find ways to use items that can be reused for a different purpose? This is one reason why we love quilting!
What baby steps can you and your family make to be more resourceful with your time and money when it comes to owning stuff?
Are you teaching your children ways to be content with less?
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More on Resourcefulmess
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By Olivia | May 31, 2009
My Great Great Grandfather Perry and his daughter Mary, my great grandmother
The Daddy-Daughter relationship is a very crucial one. It deals with the peace of the home, the protection of women and the training of little girls that will one day be cornerstones. I have been brewing on this idea for sometime now. What is a better example of the modern Daddy-Daughter relationship, than a run of the mill Disney movie? Pick any one of them and you can see that even though the daughter loves her daddy, respect is lacking, because daughter knows best; because she knows it justifies her actions- her sneaking around, her lying to her father, her keeping secrets from him. To top it off, in the average movie, the DADDY apologizes for not understanding her and not letting her grow up to ’spread her wings’.
Respect Your Father
One thing Mother has stressed in our training as women, is that men need respect, women need love. It’s just the way we were created. If we as daughters don’t realize how much respect means to our fathers, we will never be able to fully understand them, therefore, able to honor them as it is emphasized over and over in Proverbs.
How do daughters show respect? First in the way we talk to our Fathers. They are our athority, protection and greatest ally. We cannot treat them like a chum or buddy, expecting equality.
Many girls have mastered the "Yes, sir!" and "No,sir!", but they lack the spirit of obedience and meekness. Although it is important to say, "Sir", it really is not in the words you say but in how you say the words. If our attitude is "my dad doesn’t know what he’s talking about" or "I know I am right about this" then it comes out in our tone. "For out of the abundance of the heart …"
In order for you to have a good relationship with your Father you must:
Give your Father your heart.
How? I asked myself that question a hundred times, how do I give my dad my heart? The answer came through the DVD Dominion Minded Daughters, the Botkin girls were describing this.
"The heart is the seat of the emotions. It is where our thoughts are formed, our opinions are kept and our feelings are stored. We give our dads our hearts when we talk to him, when we tell him how we feel about everything and when we share our feelings."
Many girls would reply that "my dad doesn’t have time for that" or "he doesn’t listen to me". Oh darling, he listens far more than you think. Tell him what you did today, tell him about your problem with a friend, ask him questions. Girls, our dads are far smarter than we think. Dad’s want to be their daughter’s hero, but you have to let them. You have to share your dreams with him, with hopes and plans. He needs to know your dreams so he can help you build them.
The relationship with your father will be carried over into the relationship with your husband.
A girls first introduction to men comes through knowing her Father, the way she learns to treat him is the way she will treat her husband. I can’t stress enough the importance of honor and respecting your Father. All Fathers are imperfect. All Fathers have shortcomings, but the one you have is the one God gave you. Never for one moment allow yourself to question whether you should have been born into a different family. God knows you better than you know yourself. He gave you what you needed, because He loves you.
Spend Time with Your Father
The one complaint I hear from other girls the most is, "He doesn’t have time for me, he NEVER spends time with me." And I always have the same answer, "Do you spend time with him?"
You see, we tend to want our Fathers to do whatever we want to do, ‘bonding time’ must be when he is doing things for you. Oh, no no no. Let me illustrate a little.
My Dad is awesome, honestly, but he works a lot! He is a carpenter, something I really REALLY don’t like doing, because I end up handing him nails all day. BORING! But, if I want some time with Dad to pour out my heart, or share a new idea or just talk to him, that’s the time to do it. While he is working and I’m tagging behind handing him nails.
Don’t complain about your Father not spending time with you if you aren’t willing to do what interest him. When you are willing to do something you don’t enjoy just to spend time with your Dad, it sends a BIG message to him,
"I LOVE YOU DAD!"
I am willing to do more than just say the words. I am willing to be uncomfortable, for you.
Girls, that is giving your daddy your heart.
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By Mercy | May 12, 2009
This morning, I began to consider Proverbs 14:1 which says, “Every wise woman builds her house: but the foolish pluck it down with her hands.” And to reflect on the wise woman verses the foolish woman. This passage contrasts two women who were both “stay-at-home” types. However, only one is praised for her virtue.
The Wise Woman
First, the wise woman will build her home. She will garnish it with the grace of feminine beauty suitable to the admiration of both sexes. She will adorn it with the flowers of fair speech, kindly intuition, and gracious acts of mercy. She may not have much in terms of material possessions, but she is thrifty and builds upon what she already has. Or, if she is wealthy, she gives much of it away for the service of God and to be used to build His kingdom. She adds to the family economy by working “willingly with her hands.” She fixes mementos in her home by making memories out of her speech, which is “the law of kindness.” It is her portrait that is seen when a stray thought returns to her home. Her husband may be grand, or less esteemed in the world’s eyes, but she builds him up in love, respect, and affection, calling him lord. She shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of his house. Her society may be disagreeable or pleasurable, but she does all that she can to benefit the downtrodden and needy. She does not shame, but builds and restores that which is broken within and without. And, to all, she is careful not to show impatience or impolite behavior. The woman who builds her house lays it with her very life, her health, and her strength. She willingly lays down her life so that others around her may flourish. Her pleasure is gained by seeing others edified and cared for.
The Foolish Woman
In opposition, the foolish woman will be the one that pulls down with her hands what she does have. That which she alone has been entrusted with to cultivate, nurture, and beautify, she destroys. With crass words, complaining lips, and a murmuring spirit, she finds discontentment in everything. Her work is to chase vanity and to imitate vain people. Rather than work on her home (her very heart) she lets the thorns of bitterness encapsulate the life pulses of love and tenderness. Mark that woman! And, approach not unto her home to learn her ways. She will continue to sink lower and lower as her foundations crumble. Eventually, she will have nothing left. She who pulls it down, uses others to gratify her own desires. Her pleasure is mounted on the displeasures and discomforts of others.
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Let us, as Reforming Women, strive to be those who build up their houses. Repentance to God and man may be a daily thing as it is with me! You may always wonder whether you will gain the mastery over your spirit. You may cry every day “Help me God to do what’s right.” God sees you and he knows you. He will comfort you so that you can comfort others. Psalm 55:22 says, “Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.” A house is not built except one stone at a time. Even what has been torn down can be rebuilt for service to God! Let’s get building the home God has given each of us to cultivate!
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By Kathy | May 12, 2009
My husband is very resourceful. He hates to pay full price for anything, he says it is because he works hard for his money, which I have to agree!
Because he is so resourceful he knows how to get a good deal on just about anything! That combined with his carpentry skills saves, thus makes us, a good bit of money each year!
The big box stores have what is called cull, teach your kids this word. This is the stack of lumber that has a defect or two in it and is not sellable at full price. You can usually get lumber for 10 cents on a dollar, of course stores/managers vary. A 2×4 that usually cost about $5.00 you can get for 50 cents from the cull pile. The bigger the cull pile the better the deal you can get, the only thing is you have to take the whole load, so even if it is not something you can use at the moment get it anyway for future projects. Smaller piles you can pick and choose what you want.
Stores have more than lumber in their cull piles; they can also have sheetrock, bags of concrete, bricks, soil, mulch, tin, landscape timbers, etc… The key is to check often and be patient.
Lumber from the cull pile can be used for just about anything. Most projects require that the board be cut down, so you just learn to cut off the bad part. The same with sheetrock. Bags of soil, mulch and concrete that have a rip are still very usable. Look for these bags at Wal Mart too!
Teach your kids by example how to seek out these piles and ask for the best deal they can get. Stores would rather sell these at a fraction of the cost than to loose it in the dumpster.
At cull prices you can afford to let your kids learn carpentry skills.
Here are just a few things Jeff has built around our house with cull. At this point in our marriage I know if I ask for something he WILL make it for me, but I’ll have to wait on cull lumber to come available! :o)
Arbor out our front door.
Raised beds for the garden and the compost bin.
EVERYTHING in Olivia’s herb garden was built with cull, including the fencing and arbor. This mulch we actually bought at full price by the truck load when Jeff was not at home. ;o)
More on Resourcefulness
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By Kathy | April 24, 2009
Greetings Fellow Prairie Muffins!
With the state of the economy the way it is, everyone is looking for ways to stretch a dollar. One of the most effective ways to do this is by gardening; granted this takes a lot of work, but it is so rewarding and educational at the same time. This is also a perfect way to teach children responsibility. We have become so accustomed to convenience foods that growing and preserving anything is a topic that makes many people run the other way.
If you do not have any experience with gardening now is the perfect time to start learning. No one starts off being real successful with gardening, but you’ve got to start somewhere! As for our family, some years we do better than other years; no matter what, it is ALWAYS a learning experience.
Don’t despise meager beginnings. Starting small is better than doing nothing at all.; even if you only plant one pot/bucket with a tomato plant for a salad. Keeping a couple 5 gallon buckets on your porch is usually pretty low maintenance yet still productive. This may be the key to inspiring some young folks in your house.
Check out our From Seeds to Harvest Gardening Challenge!
Today’s topic: Worm Farming
Have you ever thought of worm farming, or even knew there was such a thing?! I heard of this several years ago, and like all ‘good homeschool moms’, I bought a book about it. :o) We live on a lake and know dozens of serious gardeners so I thought this would be a perfect home business for at least one of my kids, only problem was I could not get anyone to get excited about it!!?! I still think it is a great idea!
This is a great thing if you have boys. There are different types of worms to farm and different methods. If you live near fishing areas night crawlers are what you need. You can sell them to local stores/gas stations or even put a sign out in your yard.
You can also farm worms that will create GREAT compost. You can market this compost which is called castings. Or you can sell the worms themselves to local gardeners. I’ve added a few videos on our Teaching Good Things site. Gather your kids around and watch!
So far this week we have discussed raised beds and container gardening, you may want to check it out and join in on our gardening challenge.
Go here to read about our From Seeds to Harvest Gardening Challenge
and get in on the giveaways!
And HERE for the other post in this series for tips and video clips to help you out with your graden.
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By Kelly | April 23, 2009
Last year this post made a big hit and you all requested the code for sharing the official “Ruby Rebel” button on your sidebars. Since our site has changed, I wanted to remind you to change your code if you have a ruby rebel button (new code is below). If you don’t, grab it and share it! The following post describes what a Ruby Rebel is, in case you’re wondering 
“Who can find a virtuous wife? For her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
Oh to be a virtuous wife! I know what she looks like, how she speaks, how she loves her husband, and yet, reaching through the ages, I can still feel the kindred curse of Eve’s desire to control…to know better than God, and lead her husband.
I desperately cry out with Paul, “O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from this body of death?” Romans 7:24
And then another voice within me whispers, “Faithful is He who called you, who also will do it.”
NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER GIVE IN!
We will press toward the mark of the high calling!
We will fail; we will do what we know not to do; but we will keep looking to the Author and Finisher of our faith.
I want you to know through these posts that I am struggling as much as any of you; I am a sinner, a human made of flesh and blood; but I desire with all my heart to live a life that is pleasing to God and together, we will explore, encourage, and spur each other on to good works.
Now…down to business!
Proverbs 31:10 reveals an important truth–a virtuous woman is rare. That means you won’t find virtuous women on every corner; they have to be searched out (which is also important to remember as our children approach marrying age one day.)
We cannot look to the “average” woman for our example. We cannot look to the culture. She is not there. We must look to Scripture, and then pray and strive to become one of those rare jewels.
Another thing about rare jewels…jewels are rare because there are not in abundance, but also because they have to be cut out of the rock around them. They have to be chipped out, polished, chiseled on and perfected. You don’t just stumble upon a ruby that is perfectly formed and sparkling. It must endure some work.
And so must we!
Which means we must be willing to endure the process of refinement, recognizing it as God’s tenderness towards us, and His loving vision for our lives. Whatever that looks like for you, obedience and submission to HIS design will bring forth the jewel He wants to make out of you.
Foundational to all we will be discussing here, is the overarching truth that God’s ways are not our ways, and that His design is the only one that will bring our happiness and contentment in marriage.
We can kick against it all day long, but if you want a fulfilling marriage, you just have to give in to God’s ways, and stop listening to the world’s (after all, who wants a track record like theirs?) followed by practicality…that’s what we’ll be discussing over the next few days.
Ponder today whether you are willing to be a rare jewel? Rare is different. But it is valuable. In a sense, we are to be “Ruby Rebels” (leave it to me to work in the word “rebellious” while talking about being a woman
Being submissive to God is to be rebellious to the world, by default. I like it–Ruby Rebels!
To spread the word about being a Ruby Rebel with an official RR button, copy and paste the following code into your blog or site. Imagine the impact we can have for Christ!
Grab the code and share the encouragement!
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By Kelly | April 3, 2009
We’ve been "regrouping" our efforts in the kitchen to be more organized, make better use of our time and save more money. This is a real challenge when you are a "flitting visionary" like me. I have so many great intentions that don’t always get the follow-through to make them work!
One such intention is my meal menu. When we use it, it’s great! No more standing in front of the pantry at 5 p.m. chanting, "Lord, give me a miracle". The meal menu is a simple chart that tells us what kind of meal we’re having for each day–breakfast, lunch and supper.
Here is our menu, just to give you an example:
Monday:
Breakfast: cereal///Lunch: sandwiches///Supper: Soup/crockpot meal
Tuesday:
cinnamon rolls///fruit, cheese, crackers & nuts///pasta, bread & salad
Wednesday:
cereal///soup///sandwiches/baked potato
Thursday:
oatmeal casserole///sandwiches///mexican or crock pot
Friday:
fruit/toast///leftovers///homemade pizza (sometimes store-bought)
Saturday:
pancakes///leftovers or sandwiches///chicken, veg, salad, etc.
True, it’s not that exciting. And we are flexible; we may not always have the right ingredients on hand (although knowing ahead of time helps to keep them), or being pregnant, I may be craving something else Sometimes we just switch the meals around.
But as many of you know who implement a menu, it’s so helpful!
Getting Organized.
It’s easier to say than actually do (for us anyway), but my oldest daughter and I are working on preparing more things ahead of time. We have found that unless we set aside a certain time each week, this doesn’t get done. We are taking Mondays as a day we emphasize "home-ec" to do some preparing.
Things we are preparing?
Extra batch of dough to freeze or refrigerate for cinnamon rolls or dinner rolls.
Pancake mix to have ready for Saturdays.
Re-fried beans in the freezer for Mexican meals. (We just cook pinto beans, mash and season them.)
Extra batches of soup to freeze when we make soup.
There are lots more things we could prepare ahead, but we’ll be accomplishing something if we manage this list!
I encourage you to reevaluate your kitchen and menu; how you can save a few dollars a day? How can you make better use of your time to be able to spend it elsewhere? How can your organization include having meals on hand for emergency situations (a sick friend, a death, etc.)?
My new ebook has more money-saving ideas…
but it is for the beginner!
Here is my favorite economical meal:
Anything Mexican:
(These prices are from our bent & dent grocery store, so they could be a little higher if you don’t have one in your area.)
Organic chips…………….. .60 (half a bag)
Salsa………………………. .12 (a jar costs .25!)
Beans……………………… .30 (my best guess)
Corn……………………….. .40
Rice………………………… .20
Sour cream…………………..26
(The pic shows a can of mandarin oranges–.50)
Without meat, this meal, which would feed our family of 9, would cost $3.23
If we add ground turkey (which I buy a pack and divide in 3 parts), it would cost $4.89.
We eat it layered like a casserole, or separate like a taco without the taco. Of course you can eat it with tortillas, add olives, chilies, etc. or however your prefer–very versatile!
P.S. We would season the beans and/or meat with cumin, onion and garlic.
It helps me to fight the urge to want to go out to eat so often if I remember the savings–$4.00 for a meal at home vs. at least $40 out! (Unless we get the "largest seafood platter in the world) which feeds our whole family for $18. Still, the savings of eating at home are huge!!!
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By Kathy | March 20, 2009
It is wise to learn;
it is God-like to create.
J. Saxe
Because we were made in the image of God, I whole heartily believe that God put in us a desire to create; maybe not masterpieces for a museum, but masterpieces for life. Whether it be a home of beauty or fruit from the vines in the garden; improvement on an assembly line or the beauty that lies in the heart of a child, we all are given opportunities and abilities to create.
No matter what our bend is we have in us a way, a creative way, to make it better or easier. When we use our abilities to improve, or create something from nothing, we are doing what God designed us to do. He commanded us to be fruitful and take dominion. Taking dominion takes applying ourselves to a task and making it fit our need. It may be a need of efficiency or a need of beauty, either way, this is part of why God placed us here!
When your child finds an easier way of doing something with the same finished results, but without compromising morals, PRAISE THEM FOR THAT! You may be encouraging a future engineer. When a child hears you tell them they are creative, it will encourage them to use more of those creative juices!
Read the rest of our series about creativity here!
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By Kathy | February 7, 2009
We have recently started a group of girls and moms that would like to crochet or knit to give to the needy.
This is a perfect ministry for the women, especially for those that have several children and find it hard to get out and participate in other outreach projects. We meet once a month for a couple hours and work on our projects, but the majority of the project is worked on at home. If the ladies/girls cannot come to the meeting that is OK; the goal of having a group is to inspire and motivate each other!
The great thing about crocheting or knitting is that you can take it with you while you sit in the waiting room or in the car while the kids are at practice. Doing handiwork is something that takes up little space, unlike quilting or scrap booking! Most handiwork projects can be stopped at any point and picked up when it is convenient.
Proverbs 31 gives us so much to aspire for:
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
Proverbs 31:13
I just love this verse, “…and works with eager hands!” Another version says, “…works willingly with her hands.”
Just think on that! What do most girls do with their hands today? Are they eagerly looking for ways to work with them? Are they looking how to be a blessing to those around them? I dare say most girls spend many hours texting and few hours “eagerly working”.
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
Proverbs 31:20
One of my goals with our handiwork group is to use our projects to give to the needy. There are many elderly people in nursing homes that don’t receive many gifts, especially something hand made for them. We are also looking for elderly people in our community that may need the warmth of a shawl or a lap blanket.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:27
We are of great service to our husband when we manage the home efficiently. If we are truly meeting his needs, caring for our home, training the children and reaching out to the needy, there is little time for idleness. We need to be training our daughters not to be idle. As our daughters mature there are so many ways for them to be of service to mom and reaching out to the needy. There simply is no time to be idle. Be careful not to confuse rest and relaxation with being idle.
A handmade item will minister to a person’s heart in a way that little else can.
A few handiwork tips:
***Find what works for you. Some prefer crochet over knit, it really does not matter, just be eager!
***If you don’t know how, find someone that does. Most handiwork people LOVE to share their skills! (Or you can buy my DVD!)
***In the evening hours while family reading is being done have something in your hands.
***Keep your current handiwork in a bag or basket close to the chair you usually sit in.
***Once you become comfortable with a pattern crocheting or knitting can be very relaxing.
***If you will be out at lessons, practices, or appointments with the children, take your handiwork with you. You will be amazed how it helps the time go by, and just how much handiwork you can get done.
***If the phone rings and you know it will be a long conversation you can still talk and crochet/knit at the same time.
***When making an afghan or shawl use a larger hook ( I, J or K) and a thicker yarn, it will make your work move much faster.
***Set a goal of one or two projects a year to give to someone needy.
***As you work on the project, pray for the person you will be giving it to, even if you do not know them, God does!
***Watch for good sales and change of season clearance in the yarn department.
***Don’t think it has to be perfect to give to someone, it doesn’t!!! More than likely you’ll be the only one that sees your mistakes!
He who is kind to the poor lends to the LORD,
and he will reward him for what he has done.
Proverbs 19:17
Our group’s goals so far are:
January and February -Shawls and lap blankets for the elderly.
March and April -Baby blankets for Sav-A-Life (Crisis Pregnancy Center)
May and June- Booties and hats for local NICUs
If anyone has material possessions and
sees his brother in need but has no pity on him,
how can the love of God be in him?
Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue
but with actions and in truth.
1 John 3:17-18
Perhaps this is something you could do in your community? Perhaps this is something you could get a group of girls and moms together for to encourage a spirit of mercy?
… for God loves a cheerful giver.
2 Corinthians 9:7
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My Great Great Grandfather Perry and his daughter Mary, my great grandmother